Loneliness is not the absence of other people but an absence of yourself.
If you ever watched the movie pretty woman, there is a part where a guy says, ” Welcome to Hollywood, what’s your dream, everybody has a dream, some come true, some do not but keep on dreaming”. This is a true statement as we all have dreams, hopes, aspirations, passions and thoughts. Some blossom and some die. All dreams and goals begin as a simple thought. What is it that stops that thought from becoming all that it could be? Many answers have been posed to this question but I believe the number one killer of dreams is loneliness.Loneliness is a state of mind which causes people to feel empty, alone and unwanted. Being lonely is not the same as being alone. You could be in crowd and still feel lonely. People tend to feel lonely because they do not have deep human connections which is often attributed to low self-esteem. People who lack confidence in themselves often believe they are unworthy of the attention of others. Loneliness is the biggest killer of dreams because of wrong perception. Lonely people have lost touch of who they really are. As a result they feel disconnected with the rest of the world. However, the real person a lonely person is disconnected with is themselves.
I define loneliness as the demarcation line between the mind and the soul. As humans, we all have a spark of the divine in us. God who created us made us in his own image. I don’t think as humans we can fully come to terms to what that means. But as the psalmist says we were beautifully and wonderfully made. We were all born with the ability to create. It is sad that most people have lost touch with who they were created to be. This translates into an increase in the number of lonely people in society.
There is a part of us that longs for something deeper, a much deeper relationship with the source of all life. That part of us is called the soul. Our soul is that part of us that dreams, inspires, and gives us new insights. The soul longs to grow and experience new things. It hates being kept in a box. However, our natural human condition dictates the voidness of the human soul. A void person cannot connect to the creativeness and dreams. They live life aimlessly.
Lonely people try to find fullfillness by attaching themselves to others. I see this played out with women again and again. Just a little attention from a man and they are ready to drop everything to follow him. Any relationship built out of neediness is never going to work out. Relationships should come out of wholeness. Attaching yourself to someone else to fulfill you only ends up in a disaster. No other human was created to fulfill your needs. Two half people never make a whole person. But two whole people make three – this is the power of synergy.
On the other end of the spectrum, lonely people create a wall around themselves for fear of being rejected.
In business, the lonely person takes on business partners that are not good matches for their business. These business partners are chosen to fill the lonely void in their soul. It is not surprise that these types of partnerships never work out!
It is time to reconnect to the divine spark in you. It is time to dream again, to create and to be what you have been created to be. By this I do not mean make all the money you can make. Money without character breeds destruction. I want you to take the first step to find out who you really are. The very first step you can take is have a date with yourself and start learning you. I pray as you do this, God the source of all life reveals himself to you.
Have a very blessed day!